HELLO! I'M HAILEY
AND THIS IS MY WRITING PORTFOLIO
WHAT SCHOOL SHOULD BE:
High schools in movies tend to follow the same, cookie-cutter pattern. There’s always a main character telling their personal narrative of their experience. In these schools there are stereotypes of people, evil teachers, and some kind of victim telling the narrative. They normally have a group of friends who also face these challenges and its them against the world. Even if that world is a high school called Rydell or Bayside. The thing about these movies is that they set you up for something. They make you believe in this fictional world of what school is like and should be. When I was a kid, all I wanted was to be a “big kid.” I wanted to be a teenager and drive a car and go out with friends and be independent. I saw movies like this and thought nothing could be better than that. That that was the best part of life. To have that perfectly pre-designed life of what high school and adolescence was. But the thing is, life isn’t like the movies.
I was homeschooled from second grade through my sophomore year of high school. Now, I know what you could be thinking. That I was forced into this. That I had long hair all the way past my waist and wore a denim skirt that very modestly covered my ankles. That me and my 8 brothers and sisters gathered around the kitchen table every morning and my Mom taught us Bible stories. That I have no clue how to socialize with anyone my age and my family resembles a smaller version of the Duggars. But, once again, it wasn’t like that.
I have one brother who was also homeschooled. My mom chose to homeschool him because of his ADD and learning disabilities that made it hard for him to be in a “normal” school setting in 6th grade. My mom asked me when I was seven if I wanted to be homeschooled with my brother before I started second grade. I said no. I wanted to go to “real” school. So I did. Until I came home everyday and saw all the fun things my brother got to do all day with my mom. So, in October my mom pulled me out of “real” school at my request. I mean, come on. When you’re seven and you can choose to either go to school all day or get to stay home with your mom and brother, the choice isn’t necessarily difficult.
When I started middle school and during my first two years of high school, I took classes with other homeschoolers. I had friends. I still have those friends. I took classes, had teachers, and had “school” to go to twice a week with regular assignments. But, by the time I got to 10th grade, it got pretty boring being at home all the time. Granted I loved my time being homeschooled, but I needed a change. Plus, I wanted to be able to get in to a decent college. So, at the beginning of 11th grade, I went to Calvary Baptist Day School.
Calvary Baptist Day School was hell. To put it lightly. By far, it was the worst experience of my entire life. When you think of a Christian-based high school you tend to think of one thing. All the “raised right” kids from your Sunday school class put together in one room learning about the Bible. They’re nice, right? They’re welcoming, right? They’re accepting, right? Wrong. This school had a reputation. To put it simply, the worst people you’ll ever meet in your life. Whenever people would ask me what school I went to, young or old, they automatically began to look at me differently once I answered the question. I was one of them. The rich, privileged white kids who pretty much think they’re better than everyone else no matter what. Not only are they judgmental, condescending, hypocritical, and victimizing assholes but they’re also the ones leading the morning prayer and giving presentations in Bible class.
My vision of what school should’ve been compared to what it was actually like was a very rude awakening for me. I wanted that tight-knit group of friends who stuck together and spent every weekend together. I wanted a good school with good teachers, a fun environment and positive people. But instead, I got a group of the shittiest people I’ve ever met and since being in college, I’ve only talked to 2 people out of my graduating class of 54. And don’t think I didn’t have friends while I was there. I did. I was social. We went to basketball games and had a senior campout. But, have I talked to those people who I haven’t seen since that day I walked across the stage and received my diploma? Have they tried to contact me? Do I miss that great “valuable” friendship we shared those two very short but seemingly long years? Not really.
After my experiences in high school, I knew I wanted to go to a big college. I wanted the complete opposite of what I had experienced there. And that’s exactly what I got. College has by far been the best experience of my life. I live in the high rises and have met the best group of people in the world living on my floor and the floor above me. Theres about 10 of us who met the first month of school and since then we’ve been inseparable. I have met my best friends that I know I will keep in contact with for the rest of my life. Life revolves around this group of people. When we all go to eat together. Where we go out on the weekends. Who we do homework with. Who we sign up for classes with. Who I’m living with next year. Everything.
I finally got what I always wanted in college. I now have what I had always wanted in high school. I thought high school was going to be a lot better than it was. More fun and friends and less self-loathing and destroyed self-confidence. While my experience at Calvary Baptist Day School was well, shitty. It taught me a lot. It shaped who I am today. It taught me to be more open to people, to be more understanding, and not to judge others. It shaped a lot of the things I believe today and how I perceive people. My experience in my high school setting showed me what not to be. And I am grateful for that. Because without those experiences, no matter how horrible they were, it made me who I am today.